What in my chart makes me this way?

With the planets you give ( the more the better and degrees help alot to find the aspects) the main thing that I see is that your Sun in Virgo quite possibly squares your Mars in Gemini. This causes a "friction" between these two planets. Your Sun (you as an individual) is having a personal issue with Mars ( the warrior in us). A square is always a life lesson that one must work on in this life. Being a Virgo I don't doubt that you remember every detail of your anger-filled memories. Virgo is a detail-oriented sign. And with Mars in Gemini it is difficult for you to let it go because Gemini's mind in always in motion, never-stopping, always on "go." Whether it is good or bad, your mind keeps hitting those resentful feelings and so you get angry all over again. My Mamma was like that. She could remember every wrong done to her in her life and when she told the story she would get so angry it was as if is happened yesterday instead of 40 years ago! When one is in pain one will often do anything to get rid of the pain. That is human nature. My daughter suggested a hypnotist as she was able to get rid of many hurtful issues through hypnosis, My answer is what she suggested for me when I began to dwell on emotional hurts that happened in my life. First you are to acknowledge the thought by saying " I acknowledge that I have this thought right now in my mind." The next step is to say " I am now going to let this thought go." I had to do this acknowledgment many times until I was able to think about something and then let it go. I am not trying to mitigate your situation. but since this is a life lesson for you (we all have them) you are going to have to find some way to let these past hurts go. Mars life lessons are always tough because we always feel that we need to act. Maybe not act appropriately, but we want action! And we want it now! Think about all the energy that it takes to dwell on past issues. I could suggest forgiveness but Mars rarely wants to travel down Forgiveness Road. Maybe this will help as Mars needs action. Take up a sport (tennis comes to mind, baseball too like a batting cage) and when you are hitting that ball pretend that it is the one that wronged you in your past. Beat the crap out of them! Good luck to you. I wish you the best as this is not an easy lesson. Bless you